Wow I have been almost to Honest

I am surprised I actually have done what I set out to do with this Journal. I really have been brutally Honest about how and What I feel. I guess the friend was right if you cannot talk to others than find a way to talk to yourself. So it looks like this works I really have to sit back after and read and realize that I do have some problems but as long as I admit to myself I do and they are real I should be OK. I have also made a very surprising discovery, something I have know,but was afraid to admit. THe love of someone I had no idea was as strong as it is or as transcendent. The deepness scares me, but I find true comfort in the peace just knowing he is there gives me. Strange it is not the one who shares my bed who achived this one time only bond. I had given up thinking I would ever have that kind of relasionship. Turns out I do. Just not the way I though. May God always watch over him and keep him safe. TIme to get the dogs out for a bit, the air is warm skyy is bright and my pack needs a good walk, The elder and myself especially. To bad only the elder can hang his head out the window.